Mere weeks before I left my Associate Editor position at The Wave, I got a fortune cookie that made an accurate prediction: "You are soon going to change your present line of work." More recently, another wise chunk of cleverly folded baked dough told me, "Discontent is the first step in the progress of a man or a nation." And it's true. It took someone who wanted to read at night without burning his face off to invent the light bulb. It took someone with an arsenal of unorganized neckties and way too much time on his hands to develop the motorized tie rack. And it's taken an unemployed music fan with a computer, a broadband connection and "lots of potential" to create the very web site you're perusing now.

Does the world need another online music magazine? Yes - for two reasons. First, I need something to do. Second, I think many will agree that San Francisco needs another source for music lovers like me who have grown disdain for both the ass-kissing national music magazines and the city's mind-numbing arsenal of amateur, sub-par local rags.

For our premiere issue, the articles are nothing short of genius (or complete retardation, depending on how high your standards are). I'm more than blessed to have the pleasure of featuring the editorial excellence of Gregg Turkington, an accomplished writer, producer, musician and bicep model. Gregg - whose numerous writing credits include Nothing Doing, Drippy Gazette, Billboard, Goldmine, Wired, Breakfast Without Meat and his latest book, Warm Voices Rearranged: Anagram Record Reviews - dove headfirst into the puddle of shit that we call "pop-culture" and came back up with a revealing expose on affordable bling for the working man's hip-hopper. Infernal Combustion founder Keith Bergman took some not-so-precious time out of his very empty schedule to review obscure CDs buried in the dollar bargain bins at Amoeba Music. Along with Infernal Combustion (which has been praised as "The Onion of heavy metal"), Keith's work has also appeared in Pit, Brave Words and Bloody Knuckles, Terrorizer and The Wave.

Like Kevin Costner in Field of Dreams, I'm just doing what all the mysterious voices (or in my case, omniscient cookies) are telling me to do. So consider this site the first step in the progress of me and/or America. Will Perfect Pitch Online fail? It's possible. But if my fortune cookies continue their streak of stunning accuracy, let's just say that my last one told me I'd "be awarded some great honor." So regardless of how much we stink, it sounds like a certain editor has a blue ribbon and a year's supply of free ice cream coming his way.

Enjoy the stream of words that have vomited from our sick minds - and if there's something on the site that's bothering and/or exciting you, don't be a stranger.

Love and spoons,
Erik Fong

Now playing: Ween - "Exactly Where I'm At"